What do you vow will be different in your life this year?
Did you know that of the people who set New Year’s resolutions, by the end of the first week of January 25% of them will have given up?
By the end of January almost half have decided that whatever it was they wanted to change was no longer important so they quit pursuing it.
People’s commitment continues to melt away like the spring snow as the months go by.
Has that been your approach to change in your life or relationship?
Why is change so hard for most people?
After my divorce 20 years ago and a very lonely Christmas, I vowed that I would figure out the dynamics of relationships and never put myself through couples counseling ever again. To me, it was a complete waste of time.
My commitment to understand how to have a happy marriage came from a place of pain and hurt. I never wanted to experience the emotional pain of divorce again. In fact, I don’t want anyone to have to go through that. It’s why I do what I do.
As a guy, I thought intellectually that the divorce wouldn’t be that bad. I thought about all the aspects of it and it didn’t seem like that big a deal. I couldn’t have been more wrong.
Some months later all the emotional emptiness and loneliness hit, and I experienced a low point in my life that I never saw coming.
Most of us, both men and women, never see the emotional pain coming.
It’s also why over a third of women regret their decision to divorce their husbands.
The reason that change is so difficult for so many is that they aren’t experiencing enough pain to change, nor are they imagining something truly compelling enough to be worthy of their total commitment.
They hang out in the life is Ok, and it’s not that bad, category without any motivation to change. It’s a soft lie. The real pain comes later on.
What is sacred in your life?
What is valued so highly that you will do anything to protect it?
And what is the emptiness deep below all the superficial nonsense in your life that eats away at your heart?
The clock is ticking away, as another year is going by…
Will your personal happiness be greater or less at the end of 2015?
Want to finally change something that really matters to you?
Want to feel more peaceful in your life?
If you do, and don’t want to let another year to go by, just send me an email firstname.lastname@example.org we will talk about how to make what you want happen.
People overcomplicate life. Change can happen easier and faster than you think. You just need to be willing to pursue it.